New year is coming, so I have two questions for you:
- Did you make a new year resolution for this year 2018?
- Were you able to keep to your goal?
Surveys show 45% of Americans make new year resolutions, but by the end of the year, only 8% have been able to keep to their goal. After only six months, nearly half of those Americans that made a new year resolution have given up on it.
So what happens? We lose track of our objectives, we make excuses and eventually, we just give up. And how does this make us feel? Frustrated, disappointed, even angry at life.
Then we look at others and see them succeeding:
- Our neighbour managed to lose weight and now looks amazing. It must be luck.
- Our friends never leave work late. It must be luck.
- Our colleague just got promoted. It must be luck.
It seems to come down to luck, right?
Let me tell you about a Japanese good luck charm, the Daruma Doll.
A Daruma Doll is a cute toy made out of paper and glue that depicts Bodhidharma, the father of Zen Budism. The Japanese believe these dolls bring good luck, but more than that they use them to set goals. How do they use them?
Every year they buy a Daruma Doll and they gather with friends and family and talk about their objectives. The doll comes with two blank eyes. They colour in one of the eyes and write down their goal on the back. They can only colour in the second eye when they reach their goal.
Sounds cool, but how does it help them reach their goal? Two things:
- Cliffhanger Effect. Imagine you are watching a series and just before you find out who the bad guy is, you see – to be continued… Producers know we will be hanging on the edge of our seats. This is known as the cliffhanger effect. People have a need for completeness. So, when things are unfished or incomplete it creates a tension in us. With the series we want to know how it finishes. With the Daruma, every time you see that incomplete face, you will be reminded and urged to reach your goal so you can finally colour in the second eye.
- Social Anchoring. When you gather with friends and family to colour in the eye and you tell them about your goal you are creating a social anchor. By speaking about your goal you are committing and creating an expectation. Most likely someone is going to ask you: “How is your goal going?”.
And this is why the Daruma Doll is lucky it holds you accountable, while you are responsible for reaching your goal. No one can do it for you and it won’t just happen. Ultimately you make your own good luck. The Daruma doll is a reminder that makes it that much harder to give up on your goals.
So is it luck that makes us eat healthy, lose weight and get fit? Could it be more than luck, say good time management, that allows our friends to leave work on time? Might it be more than luck, say hard work, that lead to our colleague’s promotion?
No matter what New Year resolution we make, or goal we set out for ourselves it takes more than luck. It takes commitment, self-discipline and a reminder to not give up.
So choose the reminder that suits you best, go out there into the New Year and make your own good luck.
